And I wanna stay right here and go down on you for an hour..

Sunday, Sept. 25, 2005 ~ 9:03 a.m.

Cause you haunt the nights when I don't know where my life should go, well is it good for you? Is it good for you?

I've been on this massive listening binge with Third Eye Blind lately. I usually set my DJ to play their playlist only and end up listening to it all day -- I never get bored, although I must admit that their very first album was the best, with greats like Good For You (above), Losing A Whole Year, I Want You, Motorcycle Driveby, God Of Wine, etc etc. I've decided to force Alain to download some of their tracks so he doesn't miss out. I think he'll take to some of them -- we've found that we have a very high musical taste compatibility -- he sometimes lets me listen to things on his iPod that I absolutely love. And yesterday I asked him if he'd heard of Weeping Tile and he was like "You know Weeping Tile?!" It's nice to meet a guy who shares musical interests that isn't actually gay. Just very sensitive. Hehe.

Also, as a sidenote, I just want to say that at my lunchbreak nearly everyday, there is one girl (it's not always the same girl) sitting in there talking on the phones we're provided or her cell phone basically verbally abusing her boyfriend. "Think with your head, stupid." "Well that's how it is, and you'd better keep it that way." And I know they dial those boys up just to bitch at them -- I sometimes feel like doing that, taking out my frustrations about all the stupid people on people who don't deserve it, but I bet these boys get it everyday. It annoys me to no end. If I ever become a girlfriend like that, please, somebody knock me over the head with a frying pan so I'm not such a bitch. God.

And now I take a look back at all the damage we have done now to each other, to each other, to each other..

So Friday night we went out for my "birthday". Denis and I and Holly/Kyle/Trish/Val/Val's Friend, and Matty and Scottie also tried to get in but Matty is still too young. Anywho.. about five minutes into it, Denis and I got abandoned at Boom!, where they were having a toga party. We ran into Pants, who was busy being stood up by some girl he was supposed to be on a date with, and also ran into Brett, who I have seen there more than once but he swears he's not gay. We also ran into Kelly from work. It was a fairly wonderous night as Denis and I were quite inebriated before we even left Kyle's house and held hands the whole walk to the bar so we wouldn't fall down. Then we did tons of other indecent things, wandered around, and then went back to Boom! where we danced pretty much all night.

Denis said "We'll never think of each other the same way again, will we?" and he's right, but it's not all bad, you know? It's nice to see the uninhibited side of people -- I know that I am an entirely different person when I am drunk than when I am sober, soo, I'm sure some people love to see that side of me.

Patricia ran into me last week and swore that she had met my soulmate. The conversation went a bit like this:

Her: Amanda. I have found your soulmate!
Me: Oh?
Her: Cassie brought him home.
Me: Oh?
Her: He doesn't do drugs or smoke and he only drinks occasionally. His name is Garrett.
Me: And?
Her: The second I saw him, I thought of you!
Me: (thinking: and how is he my soulmate?) Oh?
Her: And we showed him your pictures in the yearbook, not from grade nine and ten, but we showed him the eleven and twelve ones because you had bad hair in grade nine and ten and he thinks you're pretty.

Searching for something I could never give you..

They were all going out for karaoke on Friday night and I probably would have gone if I hadn't already made plans with everyone else who ditched me. Denis had also gotten an invite from Justin and Alain to go to this place called Molly's, which is apparantly like paying for drinks in someone's basement. I'm going to have to take both crews up on their offers at some point -- I am determined to have a social life, or more of one -- it's just difficult when I always have to find someone's house to crash at afterwards because I don't have my own place in town, and I have to bum a ride from my parents. I really need to get my driver's license, that's all there is to it.

As a side note, we've also gotten a pair of mini australian shepherd pups which are driving me absolutely insane right now. Their names are Gypsy and Zoe and I had forgotten what it's like to have puppies that behave like actual puppies in the house. The last pups we had were great danes and they were wonderful -- they housetrained themselves, they were calm and didn't chew on things, they are the perfect puppy -- plus I hate small dogs so these ones are all under foot and awful. They're cute though, so here's a couple pics.

Here is Zoe:

She's actually quite cute, but everyone seems to love Gypsy:

That is not a good picture of myself OR Gypsy. It was the morning of my birthday and I had stayed up late the night before, that was early in the morning. God, I'm unattractive in that pic, lol. At least you can't see the fact that I'm not wearing pants!

I wonder how's it gonna be when it goes down? How's it gonna be when you're not around? How's it gonna be when we find out there was nothing between you and me, cause I don't care how it's gonna be..